If you dug up a picture of me ten years ago or any other “embarrassing” thing of my past, I’d tell you how much I love that girl in the photo you have.
I’d tell you how she served me and loved me back and how much joy she’d bring to me.
I LOVE her.
I recently had an interesting interaction with somebody close to me.
It made me realize how much inner peace I have achieved, how far I’ve come, and how willing I am to move forward from everything.
I AM PROUD of myself in my healing.
I’ve let go of A LOT of attachments to who I want people to be, or who I THINK I should be and who I THINK everyone else wants me to be.
I’m actually ok with exactly who I am! AND THAT’S SO LIBERATING!
I used to be afraid of “her”. The one that was soft and gentle with her heart wide open “ready to be broken”.
At least that’s what I was telling myself.
But now I realize there is power in my emotions.
There’s POWER in OWNING precisely who I may be in any given moment.
And despite what any one else is thinking about me, I LOVE me SO unconditionally, that I can now shrug my shoulders at anyone’s judgements of me.
Because now I know it’s not about me. Their judgements of me, is more about them.
And while I have cognitively known that, I’ve come into CONTACT with that and now embody that within me.
For instance, when I have a judgement about somebody else, I realize it’s just a deep, unloved place within myself.
Some of those things are harder to find than other, “because GOD forbid I be the same way!” as this person I’m judging.
Those things are REALLY good to look at because those judgements become barriers.
Barriers to love and true connection.
I’m ok with being seen now.
I VALUE being seen in my authenticity. What you see is what you get and I’m not apologizing! (Unless I really need to of course).
And I set aside any judgements of myself which means I can love unconditionally.
I’ve found my strength in God, and strengthened my trust in him.
I‘ve found a church community to support me and love me through this.
It was a weird thing for me (a judgement) to be in a church “worshiping” while also having these intuitive/mystical ways about my life.
I had to let it be seen and loved on before I could fully come into acceptance of who I was.
And I don’t hide this with my church family. I’m not afraid of being seen.
God’s love for me is SO special to me. Now anything I do, (not that there was a lack of it, but just a lack of understanding), is done with him in mind, the greater good in mind, and love in mind.
It’s a whole new respect for what I do and who I do it for.
I feel more safe, and more seen with him on my side.
I let his love transform me and it’s been, I feel, the only way I’ve been able to move forward in a new, special way with my family.
I’ve been in contact with them, and it’s been really revealing at how much I had resisted their love for me.
I held on to too many things. I wanted them to be something other than they were.
That was conditional love.
I’m so glad we took the time we needed to move forward for us to heal, and to realize how deeply I can allow myself to love again.
And I realize how that immaturity got in the way of connecting.
Now I can be more graceful to other people when they feel defensive against me.
I can love and respect people from afar because I realize their hurts, their pains, are not ultimately about me. It’s their story. Their journey. Their path to healing.
I now realize it’s MY responsibility and my right to surround myself with people who are LIKE me, and who honor and respect me.
And I’m so proud of that!!!
This month I’m talking a lot about the Journey to Self-Love.
There will be a series of blogs RIGHT HERE beginning July 1st!
I can’t wait to love you and guide you through your own journey to Self-Love and Acceptance too!
Comment below with ONE thing you’d love to love more about yourself, or where you struggle to come into acceptance with in your life.
Last day to be ONE of the FIVE in Foundations for a FREE group meeting is June 15th!
There’s a NEW Video series now on YouTube that talks more about the ins and out of this program. Visit the 1st 5 video series here.
And don’t forget, The Container is available for a special pricing, $120 ALL month long in June!
Or if you’re ready and want to book you spot, please reach out to me now with the form below!
I’m back on Instagram! Give me a follow and to continue this conversation, please use #journeytoselflove and tag me!! Also use #1st5videoseries for you love and comments 🙂